Tuesday, August 14, 2012

I've Been Busy

I have been busy and so sorry for neglecting my blog.  This is not a story about my past, just a short comment on my present.

I've been practicing for an audition I have coming up.  This would be for a solo spot in a pole dance recital.  I'm so nervous and my knees are really sore.

Why would a woman who has been dancing for 30 years and on a pole for 18, be so nervous?  The game has changed.  That's why.

It used to be I would be the only one in the club sliding down a pole up-side-down with one leg. This would get all the applause, mouth gapes and $$ from the mostly male audience.  These days, you have to be a contender for Cirque du Soleil to not solicit a yawn.

My fave dancer, Anjel Dust, only 3 years ago was winning competitions all over with her knee holds, aishas  and spinning side climbs on a static pole.  Now knee holds and aishas are common place.  I still think her spinning side climb is spectacular. She had to re-learn pole dancing without boots and knee pads because by 2010, she was considered disqualified if she danced in boots!

So, I've learned so much more.  Last March it was a 24 yr old and myself that were the top performers of our studio because she could death lay and I could split on the ceiling.  She has now surpassed me.  She is an instructor.  But I knew she would because she is 29 yrs. younger than me.  Becoming an instructor, was not my goal, however.

So why am I busting my ass to win a solo?  I do solos all the time for a mostly male audience.  Because this is a different game.  Because it is my legacy.  Because it's a challenge.  I'm nervous because this audience values artistic talent over sexual appeal.  This makes me scared yet carnivorously ambitious.  I have to be perfect.  I don't get to stop to pick up tips.  This is a fierce competition y'all!  I got to do it NOW.  At my age, I may not get another chance.

I've been really attuned to my fellow advanced level students/contenders.  They mostly do the same tricks.  Some are more daring than what I can do.  But......they don't have the dance, theater or seduction background that I do.

I'm in it to win it.  This is why I haven't been writing.

Btw, out of the 100 or so students we have at the studio, did I mention that I have the best abs by far?  I've been told this a lot.  But my instructor, a famed acrobat that is well versed in trapeze, hoops and lyra as well as pole; told me I had better abs than her last night:-)!!

(And I've got 20 yrs. on her).  Wish me luck!